Sunday, June 05, 2005

Feudin', Fonin' and Fruitless Festering by a Flake

During my normal Sunday morning ritual... coffee, chanting, snake handing... I happened upon a few stories of interest and random thoughts:

The Hatfields and McCoys still exist. Oh sure, sometimes shit happens, but c'mon. One of them took to barbecuing INSIDE THEIR GARAGE in order to not have to see their neighbors.

With a feud of this magnitude, it must have been something really monumental that started it. Right? Quote:
"All of a sudden, they quit waving."

Wow. Just... wow.

Random thought: What were Thurston and Lovey Howell doing on a piss-ant tour boat named "The SS Minnow," anyway?

There is nothing less interesting or personally impactful to me than a family feud over Zsa Zsa Gabor's estate.

But I must admit, it made me smile this morning. A sort of mean, wicked smile.

Cell phone competition is cutthroat. Low prices are good for the consumer, but not to this extent.

Another merger is coming, this time between Sprint and Nextel.

Our demand for the lowest rate plan has unintentionally and surreptitiously screwed us. We now have fewer choices than ever... and that is never good.

Side note: please, Sprint... PLEASE stop people from using that freakin' walkie-talkie feature. It's rude, loud and has no useful function, other than to make people feel like kids again with their GI Goe set in the back yard. "Can you hear me now?" Yeah, unfortunately I can hear waaaay too much of you, asshole. Take it private, please.


Random thought: Why do things like a walking Kool-Aid pitcher and the big fat white Michelin guy cause us to buy the product? Shouldn't it really serve as a deterrent? Hmmm.

Marilyn Monroe's personal phone book and a painting by her fetched 150-grand at auction.

"... the 1962 painting by the actress of a red rose was initially inscribed to President Kennedy, but she never gave it to him..."

Is it me, or does that seem low? I wish I had known about the auction.

Random thought: Why does the "Magic 8-Ball" have an "ask again later" response? Is it not feeling the vibe now? Is it late for an appointment?

Isn't it the job of the 8-ball to give me answers to my questions? I find "ask again later" unacceptable.

Have a good rest-of-the-weekend. Keep your powder dry.



OldHorsetailSnake said...

You asked several questions in this post. Ask again later.

Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm said...

The talking Arby's oven mitt deterred me from purchasing their lukewarm beef product for a long time.

Weary Hag said...

Annoying jingles will always deter me from purchasing many products.
As to the Howell's? I just wanna get my hands on one of those special suitcases they had. You can sure pack a load of crap into one of those puppies.

Excellent random thoughts, Dave.