Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Happy Balumtime's Day

In an effort to avoid signing a contract just to dine out on Valentine's Day, "Violet" and I did our celebrating last night. We went to a fondue place called The Melting Pot, which requires you to sign a contract and pay in advance for dining on Valentine's Day. (I suppose they have their reasons, but none that I can justify)

Lobster, steak, chicken, shrimp, dipped in a zesty, boiling liquid... while we made eyes at each other through the steam.

Oh, and a dozen roses.

Yeah, that's right... I got mad Valentine skills.

I received the nicest card I've ever received from my Balumtime, sweet Emily. It almost made me forget that Valentine's Day is a contrived "holiday" so that Hallmark, FTD and Zales can make their profit margins every year. It didn't quite make me forget, but it did remind me that I am the luckiest sonofabitch in the world.

Afterward, we took a ride home through the snowy streets of St. Louis. The story ends there.

At least the part I can talk about.


I have a little game I play with myself called "Has Anyone Said It Before?" Whenever I say a phrase that seems like maybe it's the first time those words have been used to form a phrase, I check on Google to see if I can find any references to it.

For instance, recently I said "hey, I have an earful of boob." (don't ask) According to Google, that phrase appears nowhere among the billions of pages of words on the internet... therefore, I hearby claim it as my own.

This morning, I called my dog a "wound licking asshole." (he can't seem to leave the wound from his recent surgery alone, he keeps licking it and it's getting inflamed) Again, according to Google, nothing.

Two more Dave originals. I'm so proud of myself.


Tonight is a special Valentine's Day edition of American Idol and House, MD. We Tivo'd them both last night and are having friends over to watch. Normally we do it on Tuesday nights, but we were busy filling our digestive tracts with fondue cheese... something I'm sure we'll pay for today.

So tonight it's television, cookies, and red lovey-dovey drinks for all. The feature cocktail will be Cosmopolitans, but we might throw in a Red Headed Slut for good measure. Maybe even a Bloody Shrek.

I'll report back to you.


Paula said...

So I suck!! I was reading the recipe last night, that I was going to make for tonight, only to realize that it needed to refrig overnight!! There was no way I was going anywhere last night in the snow, sooooooo nothing from me.

Although, my husband has informed me that HE is bringing something sweet over.....HMMMMM I guess we shall see.

Cosmos, YUMMY!!

Eve said...

I was going to say... last night was NOT the night to venture out?! I skidded my ass to the Valley last night for last minute V Day shopping and almost died. Plus when I got there... my key destination, the fucking World Market, was CLOSED.

Bastards! ~snicker~

Regardless, glad that you guys made it home and had happy fonduing minus contractual obligation! ;)

Blogarita said...

Have a great evening! House is a good'n, as always.

Lightning Bug's Butt said...

I always love coming here.

I'm glad to read you didn't sign that V-Day contract with the Melting Pot. Nice touch with the flowers.

I got the wife one of those delivery teddy bears. We'll see how that goes.

Regarding your "has anyone said it" thing: I once wrote a joke that I thought was mine. It went "Why rotate your tires? They rotate every time you drive."

Then I heard the joke on a rerun of That 70s Show.

I felt like such a fraud.

Fantastagirl said...

Glad you and Violet had a nice day - even if it was a day early. I can not imagine signing a contract to eat at a restaurant.

Ari said...

Ohh I LOVE the Melting Pot. Good call!

Ari said...

Also, recovering links from switch to neo-blogger... you are re-linked. :)

blakbyrd797 said...

Nice! And I'll bet you had a better time than all those saps who signed a contract to stuff themselves into a crowded restaurant and be shuffled through as quickly as possible so as not to hold up the schedule on the busiest restaurant day of the year.

LOL--"Wound licking asshole," that's great! I like to cuss at my pets, too. If you say it with a friendly intonation, they're happy and you're happy, so it's very win-win.

Diana said...

Cosmos were great! Thanks for having us over. Had a great time!

sista smiff said...

How sweet are y'all?

Are y'all still coming through Nashville soon? Do let me know if you are. I'd love to meet you both.

It's Me, Maven... said...

See, imagine how much happier we'd all be if there was a celebration for Ballantine's Day.

I'm 30-something, and I remember dad bringing home those bottles, I couldn't wait to figure out the puzzles under the cap:)