Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Opinions are like a$$holes...

... everyone has one, and they all stink except mine.

In life, I'm a giver. If I have it and someone else NEEDS it, it's yours. I have a pickup truck, which is what real givers drive. Everybody needs a friend with a pickup.

I'm also an occasional borrower. I never borrow money, but I do occasionally borrow equipment, sugar, laundry detergent or a phone.

In this post, I am borrowing a concept from Lightning Bug's Butt, a brilliant blogger in my circle of cyber-friends. I'm not borrowing it directly, but sort of expounding on it.

Bug did an entry recently called "I Believe." It's a chance for people to leave a comment about something they believe in. Pretty simple, and really interesting.

Here's where I am borrowing: I am going to anonymously feature a few of the comments he got, and allow you to either agree or disagree, and say why. Be funny, tongue-in-cheek, whatever. Just try to be respectful. Sort of a point/counterpoint, minus Jane The Ignorant Slut. Remember, this is all about your comments, so leave one if you can.


Belief 1: I believe it's bullshit that "Christmas" has become a four-letter word. The word Christmas is purposely replaced with "holiday" everywhere it used to appear, but you can sure as hell recognize the holidays, customs and beliefs of every other religion, ethnicity and person of the world -- and are expected to. Fuck that, and MERRY CHRISTMAS.

Belief 2: I believe that schools should bring back discipline. I never would have dreamed to talk to my teacher the way some kids do.

Belief 3: I believe that EVERYTHING happens for a reason. I'm not sure if there is a higher power around it or if it's just the natural order of things. Even if it's something horrible..it was something that was supposed to happen. Sometimes we can't see the truth until the fog or dust settles.

Belief 4: I believe that Ron Popeill's Showtime rotisserie works. Works damn well.

Belief 5: I believe that any mom who says "I HAVE to work" is wrong...staying at home with your kids and giving them a firm foundation is WORK in and of itself. You CHOOSE to work, because of the lifestyle you choose.

Belief 6: I believe that God should be put back in the Pledge of Allegiance and in schools.

Belief 7: I believe I should be able to eat, drink, or smoke whatever the fuck I want to, and if you don't like it, it's none of your business. I believe that people who attempt to control under the guise of altruism (i.e., "I'm concerned for your health" or "it's for the children") are the biggest hypocrites on the face of the earth.

Belief 8; I believe I am sick and tired of these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane.

Belief 9: I believe that kids are really spoiled these days and that parents should spend more time putting their foot up their bratty asses.

Belief 10: Women claim to want all the power, but they already have it but instead of admiting to it...much like the devil's greatest trick which is fooling people into thinking he never existed, women pretend they're under the control of men so they don't have to take the blame for everything. Typical. Women act as though men are animals only wanting them for their bodies, yet they brag about how tight their jeans are.

Belief 11: I believe that prayer is a great way for people to meditate and organize their thoughts and priorities, that there is a greater power than ourselves, but that nobody is listening or paying attention to us here. There is NO explanation that I can accept as to how a "Loving, Attentive God" let's babies starve to death while flies lay eggs in their eyes.
If any of this makes you feel like gouging your eyes out, here's your chance to say so. Pick a subject and opine. Anonymous posts are fine, if you need that.

Last one to comment is a rotten egg!

19 comments:

kdillon said...

Nice post.
You know how I feel about #11...we've discussed that a lot in the past.

To simply say "I agree" would be a major understatement.

❉ pixie ❉ said...

"I believe it's bullshit that "Christmas" has become a four-letter word." I thought you meant "x-mas" at first.

Mishka said...

I guess I don't agree with most of those comments. Some of them more than others, although I don't know enough about 4 or 8 to really comment on those.

Blogarita said...

Belief 5: I believe that any mom who says "I HAVE to work" is wrong...staying at home with your kids and giving them a firm foundation is WORK in and of itself. You CHOOSE to work, because of the lifestyle you choose.

I'm going to both agree and disagree with this one.

First, I believe that all moms are working moms, whether they are stay-at-home moms or out in the public workplace.

Second, the word ANY is the catch in the original author's statement. There are mothers out there who simply must work. Nearly all single mothers and some married mothers must be the primary, if not sole, breadwinners for their families.

However, I do agree that when there is another breadwinner in the household, a mom (or dad) who wants to be a stay-at-home-parent can very likely do so. It isn't easy. It requires many sacrifices and lifestyle changes, including but not limited to following a tight budget, drastically reducing spending on non-essential items, and elimination of many entertainment/social activities.

I've been on both sides of this fence, and I believe it is unfair to criticize either parenting lifestyle. It's hard work no matter how you approach it.

mckay said...

Belief 1: I believe it's bullshit that "Christmas" has become a four-letter word. The word Christmas is purposely replaced with "holiday" everywhere it used to appear, but you can sure as hell recognize the holidays, customs and beliefs of every other religion, ethnicity and person of the world -- and are expected to. Fuck that, and MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Mckay says: I did a post on
my 'holiday' gripe last Christmas, except w/o the cussing.

Belief 2: I believe that schools should bring back discipline. I never would have dreamed to talk to my teacher the way some kids do.
Mckay says: I agree. I went to Catholic schools through 12th grade. I was never spanked, slapped or hit on the knuckles with a ruler. I only saw one boy spanked in front of the class. Everyone knew to respect the teacher.

Belief 3: I believe that EVERYTHING happens for a reason. I'm not sure if there is a higher power around it or if it's just the natural order of things. Even if it's something horrible..it was something that was supposed to happen. Sometimes we can't see the truth until the fog or dust settles.
Mckay says: I disagree with “everything happens for a reason”. I believe our free will determines our course in life. I like the analogy of our life being an ornate oriental rug: from our perspective on earth we see the bottom portion of our life’s rug – it’s all a jumble with loose threads, knots and it makes no sense. When we get to heaven we’re able to see the rug from God’s perspective and it’s a beautiful, intricate pattern, weaved with our life’s successes, failures, happiness and sorrows.

Belief 5: I believe that any mom who says "I HAVE to work" is wrong...staying at home with your kids and giving them a firm foundation is WORK in and of itself. You CHOOSE to work, because of the lifestyle you choose.
Mckay says: I agree that all MARRIED moms (or dads) can and should stay home to raise their kids if their spouse is willing to shoulder the responsibility of being the sole provider. Divorced or single moms and dads don’t have the luxury of a provider for their family other than themselves.

Belief 6: I believe that God should be put back in the Pledge of Allegiance and in schools.
May says: last I heard He’s still in there. Did some ruling get passed while I was asleep?

Belief 7: I believe I should be able to eat, drink, or smoke whatever the fuck I want to, and if you don't like it, it's none of your business. I believe that people who attempt to control under the guise of altruism (i.e., "I'm concerned for your health" or "it's for the children") are the biggest hypocrites on the face of the earth.
Mckay says: I dunno. I was raised that drugs are bad for us, dangerous and harmful, hence they should be illegal. If I follow that logic then perhaps we should ban smoking, alcohol, guns and the frequent intake of hot fudge sundaes. Prohibition didn’t stop drinking, that’s for sure. It just created a black market and got Brad Pitt’s character killed in A River Runs Through It. Maybe I’m more Libertarian than I thought.

Belief 9: I believe that kids are really spoiled these days and that parents should spend more time putting their foot up their bratty asses.
Mckay says: I agree that parents need to discipline quickly and with loving force. Use tough love on your two year old and you just may avoid having to send your teen to boot camp for delinquents. I saw a neighbor boy throw down his bike and kick it because his mom called him over to talk to him about writing bad things with chalk on my driveway. He wasn’t punished for the bratty chalk slur against my little boy or for mistreating his bike. I would’ve taken the bike away and sent the kid indoors for a big old fashioned ‘talking to”, if you get my drift. It was very hard to keep my mouth shut instead of letting the mom know it’s her fault she’s raising a spoiled brat and a mean kid.

Belief 10: Women claim to want all the power, but they already have it but instead of admiting to it...much like the devil's greatest trick which is fooling people into thinking he never existed, women pretend they're under the control of men so they don't have to take the blame for everything. Typical. Women act as though men are animals only wanting them for their bodies, yet they brag about how tight their jeans are.
Mckay says: This is the most poorly written thing I’ve read in a long time, but I tend to agree with the concept. The play, Lysistrata, illustrates the power women hold over men ;0)

Belief 11: I believe that prayer is a great way for people to meditate and organize their thoughts and priorities, that there is a greater power than ourselves, but that nobody is listening or paying attention to us here. There is NO explanation that I can accept as to how a "Loving, Attentive God" let's babies starve to death while flies lay eggs in their eyes.
Mckay says: wow. What a graphic illustration of my weakest link of faith. That’s the type of thing I’ll be asking God if I meet up with him. Ever hear that song from Crash Test Dummies?

C said...

Belief 5: I believe that any mom who says "I HAVE to work" is wrong...staying at home with your kids and giving them a firm foundation is WORK in and of itself. You CHOOSE to work, because of the lifestyle you choose.

I am a single mom...who's going to pay my bills..my rent...etc....I have to work...or should I live off my tax paying friends and go on welfare...

ned Wilkinson said...

1.) Last time I checked, we still had freedom of religion in this country. My Jewish friends are pretty insistent on celebrating Hanukkah. The food's really good.

2.) Oh please. I remember EXTREMELY rude kids in my class. They just got kicked out. There wasn't as much of a push to graduate every single student.

3.) 9/11 happened for reasons... extremely shitty reasons.

4.) Way to go, Ron Popeil!

5.) So a mom who chooses not to raise her kids in substandard housing and feed them substandard food, etc., and works outside the home in order to make this a reality... has to catch grief for it?

6.) Last time I checked, we had separation of church and state. Pat Robertson HATES it that way.

7.) I believe I should be able to be in a public place and not have to choke on your second-hand smoke. That DOES make it my business.

8.) Like Samuel L. Jackson needs more money?

9.) Oh please. There have been bratty kids forever. Curiously, they tend to grow up to be controlling and even abusive parents. I don't know what's up with that.

10.) I'm gay. The only woman who controls me is my mom. She does a pretty damn good job, too. The rest of you gals can wear anything ya want, I don't mind, knock yourselves out.

11.) Frighteningly, that would explain a lot.

Amandarama said...

Per Belief #2 - Sure, me too. And while we're at it, I'd like them to institute an iron clad insurance policy that protects my ass from a lawsuit by an overprotective, enabling parent when I actually try to implement said discipline.

Per #11 - I don't think anyone is really listening either. If I were religious, I'd say that the Lord helps those who help themselves. However, I'm an atheist.

Chris Johnson said...

Belief 1: I believe it's bullshit that "Christmas" has become a four-letter word. The word Christmas is purposely replaced with "holiday" everywhere it used to appear, but you can sure as hell recognize the holidays, customs and beliefs of every other religion, ethnicity and person of the world -- and are expected to. Fuck that, and MERRY CHRISTMAS.

I agree to also say MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Belief 2: I believe that schools should bring back discipline. I never would have dreamed to talk to my teacher the way some kids do.

This I also believe in...I got spanked ONCE! that was all it took...Maybe my son would learn some respect.

Belief 5: I believe that any mom who says "I HAVE to work" is wrong...staying at home with your kids and giving them a firm foundation is WORK in and of itself. You CHOOSE to work, because of the lifestyle you choose.

I strongly disagree with this one,living a certain lifestyle has nothing to do with it for a lot of people out there. Not everyone out there makes a ass load of money, and sometimes it takes 2 fulltime jobs for a family to live.

Belief 9: I believe that kids are really spoiled these days and that parents should spend more time putting their foot up their bratty asses.

Again I agree, I would never have even consider talking to my mom the way I hear some kids talk to thier moms!!


Hopefully I won't be the last to post. I don't want to be a rotten egg since Bill's butt already smells like a really rotten egg!!

Lee Ann said...

Belief 5: I believe that any mom who says "I HAVE to work" is wrong...staying at home with your kids and giving them a firm foundation is WORK in and of itself. You CHOOSE to work, because of the lifestyle you choose.
This was written by a stay at home mom, right?
Well, I totally agree and disagree.
Staying at home raising your kids, providing a strong foundation is definitely a JOB.
But, not all moms that work, choose to work. Some HAVE to work, due to circumstances.
I think the moms that have to raise their kids, by themselves because the dad walked out, and have to work to try to provide for her children and herself, and make it to every little league game, gymnastic practice, football practice, football game and dance team performance has a JOB. Most likely not by choice, but out of necessity.
Either way, both sides...have a JOB.

Lee Ann said...

Oh, I just read Blogarita....looks like we have almost the same opinion.

Eve said...

Ummmm. Dave.

I have decided to refrain from partaking in this one.

Why?

I gouged my eyes out SO hard on the bulk o' them... I can't even fucking see any longer?!

I can't get started. My blood pressure can't take it. =O

rachel said...

Could you have opened a can of worms here dave? I'm on number 7, I agree with it, but then Ned, just shot my beliefs in flames.

Ned Wilkinson said...

I'm sorry, Rachel! I can't keep my mouth (or typing fingers) shut! :) If if means anything, I also think it should be perfectly legal for a person to go out into the woods, sit around a campfire, and smoke weed until they're catatonic! I just don't want that person to be my airline pilot for a couple of days at least. Modern life is full of those catches!

(No, I don't smoke weed. But someday I'm going to go to Norway and have a perfectly legal hash brownie and sit around the piano until I fall over in a stupor. I can't hurt anyone by operating a piano under the influence.) :)

It's Me, Maven... said...

As a change of pace, I'll post what stuck with me after reading this post:

...babies starve to death while flies lay eggs in their eyes.

Quite a vivid picture you paint there, Dave...

arthist99 said...

1. Get over it. Say Merry Christmas if you want, and let everybody else do their thing. Don't be so friggin' whiny. Or damn, move to GA - we've got plenty of religious bigotry down here.

2. Schools AND parents should bring back discipline. I knew better than to disrespect my teachers in fear for my life (well, my backside anyway).

3. Everything doesn't happen for a reason, but you will find a reason to rationalize everything that happens.

4. No kidding?

5. If you don't understand "I have to work" maybe you'll understand "I have to eat this week."

6. God wasn't supposed to be in the pledge to begin with. Pray to your own god whenever you like. Nobody is keeping you from that.

Enough of my opinions for now. Man, you shouldn't have gotten me started!
Ginger

OneHungMan said...

OneHung believes that those who never played baseball are the ones responsible for destroying it.

First, free agency came along and did its best to ruin it. In the past, players came up thru the farm system of teams and once they reached the major leagues, they stayed with the teams. Case in point, the Dodgers infield was together for almost the entire decade of the 70s. Now, once it's contract time, the players flock to whoever pays the most...generally not their current team.

Then the umpires got involved and shrunk the strike zone. The strike zone is defined as the area under the shoulders down to the area above the knees. Now, if the pitch isn't at the belt, it's a ball. This has created the equivalency of fucking tee ball.

As if those two things weren't enough, doctors and trainers got involved with steriods and other "performance enhancing" items. Now, because players are practically hitting off a tee, guys who had never before hit 20 homes in a season are hitting 50.

Go back to the good old days when kids actually wanted to play baseball...bring back the old rules and let it be our national past-time again.

SistaSmiff said...

I believe it's comment #5 that informed me I work because I have chosen "This lifestyle" and I should be home with my babies and basically, I'm selfish.

One, my "babies" are not home all day. I have a high school freshman, a 7th grader and 3rd grader. I sho as HELL aint gonna homeschool them. ICK.

What "lifestyle" have I chosen?? Is it all my fancy cars and vacations??? Clothes? Somebody must be hiding all this from me. I work cause if we didn't, we'd live in the projects. We live in a very basic, 3 bedroom ranch house that was built in 1975.

I hate blanket statements like that.

Sally in Brisbane, Australia said...

My answer is D... all of the above.... well.. certainly all of them that made sense in an Australian context... who is the rotisserie guy? Get out of my head and back into your own please :)

1. I have no probs with my Christian kids learning about Ramadan or Yom Kipur.. its good for them... pity other kids can't learn about Christams (and I don't just mean ethnic minorities, much ignorance of Christian tradition here as well).

2. Each generation is getting progressively less respectful.. got no answers just opinions.

3. Everything happens for a reason. Q.E.D.

5. Its all about choices... every damn thing. Good choices/Bad choices... the basis of how we live each moment.

7. Fuck yeah.

9. Just a pity I can't put my foot up the arse of any one elses kids I reckon... although I'm not real good at it with my own, at least I recognise the need when it arises.

10. I've always felt pretty powerful. As a woman I can say "yes" or "no", but the blokes can only say "please?". As a short fat woman, I'm rarely asked, so its moot... but my philosophy has always been "why strive for equality at the expense of feeling superior"... I also reckon we're s'posed to be different anyhow. I hate mowing!