I found a toy I do not own. It's actually for sale on e-bay, click here to see the listing.
At only 19,999.95, it looks like I can afford to buy one for each of my friends... Gary, Mike, Rick, Ron, John, Billy, Roger and Dave. I plan to purchase a plot of land upon which we can operate the "Badonkadonks." For an hour we can play tag in them. The next hour will be a cross-country coyote hunt-n-shave, then a little time for demolition derby.
At the end of the night, we'll build a fire, drink Milwaukee's Best Light and scratch ourselves. The coyotes will huddle close to the fire, shivering. Then we'll polish our body armour, floss and drift off to a restless sleep.
The next morning it's IHOP for salisbury steak and whipped cream.
Gosh, I can't wait. I think I'll sharpen my hedge trimmers.