Download me straight to hell...

Recently I began receiving a daily newsletter from a website called HisAir.net. It's a Christian radio site I've never visited, so clearly I couldn't have put myself on their email list.

And yet I now get this daily, annoying newsletter... from The Lord.*

I can't seem to force myself to put it on my spam list. I mean, how could anyone ask Norton to filter God? If he's real, he's clearly a 'safe sender.'

Besides, he may be trying to email me my PIN.

HP = Heave Printer

Ever thrown a printer across the room and heard it slam to the ground, crushing the internal parts into useless plastic shards? I had never known that experience until yesterday.*

After clicking "OK" for the 40th time because the black cartridge was empty, and reprinting a check to the federal government (which was due in 30 minutes) a handful of times because the printer couldn't understand that the paper WAS, in actuality, inserted correctly... I blew a small gasket.

Pulling the power cord from the wall (and that's all because it was a wireless printer) I picked up the printer, turned toward the door and heaved it into the family room outside of my office.

"CRASH!!!!!" At the same time it felt great and horrible.

I made out the check by hand, got to the bank with 45 seconds left, then went to Office Depot and bought a new printer. (it's such a new model, it's not even on their website yet - they had just gotten it in that day) I'll never go back to HP printers again - I'm a Brother man now.

The new printer is quite large and very heavy - therefore not throwable.



And now the fine print - I'm not proud of losing my temper. I haven't been that mad in a long time, and it was the culmination of several events during the day that stacked up over time. I hate waste. It was an okay printer and was only 8 or 9 months old, but it seemed crazy to allow a piece of equipment to stand in the way of productivity. I figured since it wasn't working I needed to replace it... but I feel pretty stupid for having thrown it.

The fightin' burners

In 1985, when I worked at a radio station in California, Missouri, one of the nearby towns we would provide news coverage for was Bunceton, Missouri. (if you click that link, you'll find that Bunceton actually has a Wikipedia entry with population info and coordinates - and that's pretty much it)

During the time, I remember thinking that Bunceton needed a reason to be famous. I remember fantasizing that I was the president of the Bunceton Chamber of Commerce and was trying to lure a tech or engineering school to the city... to offset the image of "hicktown in the middle of nowhere."

I fantasized the mascot would be a flame with arms and legs. They'd call themselves the Bunceton Burners.

That's life in Dave's head.

EDIT: I will stop blogging drunk. I will stop blogging drunk. I will stop blogging drunk...