Monday, November 12, 2007

Dick & Jane

I'm not sure if there is a more culturally influential or familiar book series than Dick & Jane. From the 1930's through the 70's, Dick & Jane were probably the most popular children's book characters in the world. And why not? I mean, come on... the kid's name is Dick. We had all kinds of fun with these two. If you were old enough to make Barbie and Ken do dirty stuff, you probably changed the words of the D & J books.

Once at a trivia night, someone told me that no two-syllable words appear in the book series. I've since learned that's not true, there are several two-syllable words, like "Mother," "Father," and "oral."* I think it would have been more fun if there were a syllable restriction.

Just for fun, I thought it would be a timely exercise (considering Violet and I are having a baby boy in April) to have Dave's Window readers write our own version of Dick & Jane. Write a paragraph and post it under "comments," and let's see how the story evolves. Write whatever you'd like, just make sure it flows with the previous paragraph. Don't worry, I promise I won't let Sparky see this until he turns 18.

I'll start it out:

See Dick and Jane. They are playing in the back yard. Spot and Puff are chasing each other in the sand box. "Look, Dick," said Jane. "There is something behind the fence. What could it be?"
It's your turn.

*Okay, so "oral" only appears in my perverted versions of the book, but whatever.

14 comments:

Weary Hag said...

See Dick run to the fence. Run dick run. Dick looks so happy! "Oh gosh!" said Dick.
Jane runs to see what Dick is excited about.
Dick smiles and points to the hole in the fence.
Jane giggles and tells Dick to be touch it. "Touch the hole, Dick!" said Jane. "Go on, I dare you."

Weary Hag said...

(were we supposed to EDIT our little Dick and Jane page? Cuz I didn't know that or I would have removed the word "be" in my seventh sentence. Honest I would have)

Annie Jones said...

"No Jane. I won't touch the hole!" says Dick. "My hand will get dirty. I don't like to get dirty."

"Then look through the hole," says Jane. "Quit being such a dick, Dick."

Anonymous said...

"Fuck you Jane, you are such a bitch!", says Dick.

Chris Johnson said...

"Don't call me a bitch, you big sissy!" says Jane. "I will touch the hole, and on Monday at school I am telling everyone that your favorite show is Queer Eye For The Straight Guy!" Jane touched the hole and her hand got wet. "WTF" said Jane. Then she looked through the hole, and to her surprise she saw...........

Annie Jones said...

"WTF?" asked Dick. "What the fuck does WTF mean?"

Anonymous said...

I've never heard of the Dick and Jane series of books. I feel so ignorant.

Great idea, soliciting your readers to contribute to the story.

Amandarama said...

See Dick. Dick walks away from Jane. Walk Dick walk. See Jane. Jane spots Spot. Spot Jane spot. Spot barks at...a strange man in a van who has candy. Bark Spot bark!

V said...

Dick, Jane and Spot go to the van. The man sees them and shuts the door fast. The man did not have candy! The man had money! "Why did the man have money?" Jane asks Dick. Think, Dick, think! The van drives away!

Anonymous said...

Turkey Jane, says Dick. Dick sees turkeys. Poor turkey. Jane says, Run turkey, run! See turkey run. Jane sees bad man steal turkeys. Bad man. Bad bad man. Dick say bad man looks like Dave Morris. Bad Dave, bad bad Dave. See Dick moon bad bad Dave.

Lee Ann said...

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!
~XO
LEE ANN

Spinning Girl said...

Lee Ann just ruined the story.

Jane points to the moon and says, "Look, Dave, I see the moon!" Dave hits the moon with his hand. "O1!" says Dick. Dave runs away. Dick, Dave, and Jane all run to Lee Ann's house. They knock on her door. Lee Ann sees them and says, "hello!" Dave says, "Lee Ann, your story had too many long words in it!" Lee Ann shuts the door.

Spinning Girl said...

Oops I mean "OW!, not O1.

jamwall said...

"Squiggle," says Dick to Jane. (that's two syllables)