9 - The "humble brag."
8 - The "I was a comedian in a previous life."
7 - The "blatantly passive-aggressive."
6 - The "someone ask why I'm in the emergency room." (also see #7)
5 - The "cryptic message to someone but you all get to read it." (also see #7)
4 - The "thinning my friend list." (fine they're probably ALL also #7)
3 - The "you probably won't share this."
2 - The "picture of _____, taken in front of something I REALLY wanted you to see."
1 - The "words that take the place of actually doing something meaningful."
A couple of honorable mentions - the oft-times vomit-inducing "look at my feet," the "I'm sharing an IQ test only as an excuse to share MY score," the "look at my injury, no really, LOOK AT IT," and finally, the "I haven't mastered grammar." (which could overlay any of the above)
